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Things That Never Added Up To Me

by Al Grierson

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1.
LONELY DEADHEAD BOXCAR There’s a lonesome whistle calling like a magpie to the moon as the sunset finds another place to play And the coyotes grin like roughnecks in a honky tonk saloon as the night falls and the foothills fade away And the shadows in their silver slips are dressing up to dance With the ghosts of dusty boomers in a sleepy time romance While the twilight seems full of diesel dreams so they know just what to wear Round some lonely deadhead boxcar way out there Now the empty weathered houses and the old abandoned barns Form a web of tombstone shadows on the trail As the night becomes a necklace of a dozen dusty arms to the humming of the highball on the rails And the land is like a table set with tumbleweeds and sage Flat as a drifter’s pockets and empty as a stage Where the northern lights go stepping out Like a farmboy Fred Astaire Round some lonely deadhead boxcar way out there And the stars are all out drinkin cause there’s nothin else to do But cruise along across the milky way Til they get so drunk they stagger round and stumble from the blue To slumber off another prairie day And no one seems to know it all except the engineer Who passes on the signal to the brakeman in the rear That the stars are working nightshift just to decorate the air Round some lonely deadhead boxcar way out there Round some lonely deadhead boxcar way out there
2.
FIFTY-CENT SNEAKERS I been out in the boonies a workin since fall Stuck in the bunkhouse and climbin the wall And I’ve papered the ceiling from corner to crack With visions and dreams as I lay on my back Now I’m tired of workin and wonderin why The winters just crawl and the summers all fly Why money’s the same way as time in the end So hard to hang onto, so easy to spend So I’ll hang up my workboots and grab my guitar Cause I know that the highway’s in love with my car And I’m tradin the sawmill, the bush and the mine For fifty-cent sneakers and five dollar wine Goodbye to the mud and these ugly machines I’m young and I’m single with cash in my jeans And I’m headin for someplace where customs incline Toward fifty-cent sneakers and five dollar wine Where the northwind blows crazy with nowhere to blow There’s somebody waitin to kiss me hello With a bed on the backporch and a welcome design Around fifty-cent sneakers and five dollar wine And I’ll watch some old firefly flirt with the moon Light a lighbulb in love with a baby’s balloon While the stars dance the jitterbug over the pine And the Big Dipper’s flowin with five dollar wine And I won’t have to shiver or slave in the cold Or gather up summers as if they were gold Cause the loomguns were outlawed in 1909 Now it’s fifty-cent sneakers and five dollar wine And I’ll live like a landlord without any care If I ain’t got a bottle or something to wear Cause the boss and the banker will labour like swine Makin fifty-cent sneakers and five dollar wine Yeah, the boss and the banker will labour like swine Makin fifty-cent sneakers and five dollar wine
3.
THE ZEPHYR (TAKE IT SLOW) By Jack Hardy Take it slow, take it easy, take it any way you can Take it all, take it freely, take it like a man Take it down along some highway down a lonesome railroad track Take it anyway you want to but never take it back Some people have such neat houses All of their flowers in a row No surprises in their closets Nothin the neighbours do not know And that’s why God made railroad ties To keep the flowers in their place And that’s why God made railroad watches – to keep the rats in the race Take it slow, take it easy, take it any way you can Take it all, take it freely, take it like a man Take it down along some highway down a lonesome railroad track Take it anyway you want to but never take it back Some people have such neat lives – No screamin in the hall No prescriptions in their pockets No crutch called alcohol And that’s why God made the corporate ladder To make the others feel so small And that’s why God made Jacob’s Ladder – So we could all climb the walls Take it slow, take it easy, take it any way you can Take it all, take it freely, take it like a man Take it down along some highway down a lonesome railroad track Take it anyway you want to but never take it back Some people pay such neat dues To the devil or their boss At the crossroads, at the station Or at the Stations of the Cross And that’s why God made the Burlington Northern Atchison, Topeka, Santa Fe And that’s why God made railroad whistles – So we can blow it all away Take it slow, take it easy, take it any way you can Take it all, take it freely, take it like a man Take it down along some highway down a lonesome railroad track Take it anyway you want to but never take it back Okay… time to ride off into the sunset... We’re outta here We’re tailights dudes We’re off like a prom dress…
4.
SUNDAY WAY UP YONDER It was Sunday way up yonder, it was on the seventh hole The good Lord missed a birdie putt And lost his self control The Caddie lost his self esteem but the Clubhouse got the ball When a 20-acre divot came tearing through the wall It rumbled through the kitchen like an epileptic whale It blew the needle off the top of Mr Richter’s scale It broke the mirror above the bar and busted all the stools It even broke a little wind but never broke the rules It squeezed them like the vintage where the grapes of wrath are stored As they interface like insects With the windshield of the lord They treated all they came upon with equal disrespect It was fully liberated and politically correct It scandalized the universe it vandalized the stars It wiped the face of Elvis off the other side of Mars Then came back to the fingers of the good lord’s waiting hand Like a 20-acre yoyo on a cosmic rubberband They knew that the insurance man was never gonna pay For act of God, or flying sod or random clods of clay So they prayed with all their might the Lord would save their souls And take a smaller divot when he played the other holes Ohhh ohhh o man!
5.
THE WILD DOGS OF KITWANGA Riding through Kitwanga in a sleepy autumn rain We were running several hours late when the hoghead stopped the train Though you couldn’t find a single soul To disembark or ride The dining car was open at the doorway on the side And waiting there beside the track like orphans on the rails A pack of dogs with hungry eyes stood waggin hungry tails There was Three Legs with his gimpy gait lookin all dressed up to dine While Blackie served as Maître D’ at the door of Number 9 Ai deedalayeeoh ohdalayeehoo 3X Ai dee deeyadee oohdalayeehoo I was greener than a baby spruce in a sudden summer snow So I asked where they had come from, no one seemed to know If they had a dog biography or a time when they’d been tame Then the Hogger said as he hung his head How Three Legs got his name He was running hard for Number 10 Tryin to get some more to eat The only dog that could pace the Hog when he still had four good feet But he slipped beneath the baggage car and I couldn’t see him there So now the cooks make certain that he always gets his share As far the rest, it’s hard to guess but I have heard some folks say Blackie there was just a pup when his owners moved away That they moved to town when the mill shut down And the bad times chased the good He was left alone to cry and do the best he could Ai deedalayeeoh ohdalayeehoo 3X Ai dee deeyadee oohdalayeehoo Now though they may be wild They’ll have a home beyond the blue Cause they love the railroad just as much as the folks who fill the crew There’ll be four good feet and enough to eat Up on Heaven’s railroad line For the Wild Dogs of Kitwanga at the door of Number 9 Ai deedalayeeoh ohdalayeehoo 3X Ai dee deeyadee oohdalayeehoo
6.
DUST BOWL DON QUIXOTE Out out on the open highway with the city far behind Visions of another generation swept across my mind Of the whiskey-drinkin rounders and the other ramblin men Runnin out from California to New York town and halfway back again Don Quixote in your car with your French harp and guitar Have you traveled very far Does your soul still show the scar All the outlaws and the Okies that you keep on lookin for Say this train ain’t bound for glory anymore I went lookin for the places where they slept out in the rain While the oceans and the orchards and the fields of golden grain When I asked the station master where the hoboes all had gone He just pointed down the railroad track and said they’d gone you rolling In the Big Rock Candy Mountain where the river runs with rye I spied a train of empty boxcars looking at the sky And there beside the fire looking serious and still Jesse James and Coleman Younger, The Cisco Kid, Woody and Joe Hill It was cigarettes and politics and whiskey jugs and wars Pals in penitentiaries and pallets on the floor They said there was a time to fight and another time to run A time to use a picket sign, a time to use a bullet and a gun Don Quixote in your car with your French harp and guitar Have you traveled very far Does your soul still show the scars All the outlaws and the Okies that you keep on lookin for Say this train ain’t bound for glory anymore So this train ain’t bound for glory and the highway’s not the same It’s what you do when you arrive, it’s not the way you came Let the windmill be a windmill and the heretic be wrong Put your visions in the future and your heroes in the past where they belong Don Quixote in your car with your French harp and guitar Have you traveled very far Does your soul still show the scar All the outlaws and the Okies that you keep on lookin for Say this train ain’t bound for glory anymore
7.
THAT ENDLESS FASCINATION I woke this morning in a Valentine, it must be love and not just the wine It’s late October and the snowfall’s comin due Well I never did put much stock in names But she’s a bloodkin relative of Jesse James And I got six bullets in the heart that say it’s true Now I think about her under skies of blue I think about her even when it rains And with that certain special kind of something that recalls to mind That endless fascination that Jesse had for trains I used to think that all romance was just a silly circus dance That a love was just a swindle or a sweet and bitter game Or like a candle living spite for lonely creatures in the night Who only find each other when they meet inside the flame Now I think about her under skies of blue I think about her even when it rains And yes I’m guilty I confess I think of her with tenderness And with that endless fascination that Jesse had for trains I was living in the desert then with hungry ghosts and hollow men Not knowing where to look for love or even where to start And I found the answer hidden there inside the perfume of her hair Like an undelivered letter from the landscape of her heart Now I think about her under skies of blue I think about her even when it rains I think of her on sunny days in all those countless little ways And with that endless fascination that Jesse had for trains We walked together to her car, she said it wasn’t very far I said I hoped she parked it on the dark side of the moon Cause love’s a dance too hard to call when duty’s drummmin on the wall And sorrow’s seldom sweet at all when you say goodbye too soon And I think about her under skies of blue I think about her even when it rains I think about her constantly and wonder if she thinks of me With that endless fascination that Jesse had for trains Well a wise man said it long ago, the final cause of human woe Is simple human hatred and simple human greed And it takes a fool to be a slave to what you loathe and what you crave When freedom comes so easily and love is what you need And I think about her under skies of blue I think about her even when it rains I think about her everywhere until there’s almost nothing there But that endless fascination that Jesse had for trains We’ll meet again, it’s plain to see She’s tangled in my destiny We’ll be so fine together that we both begin to weep Then we’ll order up a thousand clowns to play the mouth-harp upside down And dance across the ceiling while we sing ourselves to sleep And I'll think about her under skies of blue I think about her even when it rains And I’ll never wonder Is it love? or just the mere reflection of That endless fascination that Jesse had for trains I woke this morning in a Valentine, it must be love and not just the wine It’s late October and the snowfall’s comin due Well I never did put much stock in names But she’s a bloodkin relative of Jesse James And I got six bullets in the heart that say it’s true
8.
THINGS THAT NEVER ADDED UP TO ME There were people setting fire to the hills When I asked them what they did it for They told me it was something the women used to do When they sent their sons and lovers to the war A beacon for the wooden ships at sea Though I never understood how ships had eyes Things that never added up to me So seldom prove a puzzle to the wise Rock a round, rock a round, Rock a round my Sarah Jane There’s a place to lay their heads in Valparaiso Far away from wind and snow Where the whalefish never blow And the dark-eyed ladies haul our woes away There’s a ragamuffin minstrel at the door He must be working in some other song He’s got a manifesto and a notebook full of dreams And he doesn’t seem to know where they belongs He’s lookin for a handle to his pan, But the tinker’s old and rusty at his art Hasn’t fixed a pot in twenty years Since he opened up a trade in broken hearts Rock a round, rock a round, Rock a round my Sarah Jane All the way from Dublin Bay to Valparaiso Oh we’ll be of better cheer when we’re ankle deep in beer And the dark-eyed ladies haul our woes away Oh if I could find the oyster of the world I’d buy the gun they used to shoot the moon Then ballyrag the governments to never make a law – Just tell the truth on Thursday afternoon But I wouldn’t care to set the world on fire No I never had a taste for oyster stew If they ask to see my heart’s desire, I’d show the world a photograph of you Rock a round, rock a round, Rock a round my Sarah Jane If we ever reach the docks in Valparaiso There’ll be silverware and wine And the bed won’t smell of brine When the dark-eyed ladies haul our woes away Rock a round, rock a round, Rock a round my Sarah Jane There’ll be silverware and wine And the bed won’t smell of brine And the dark-eyed ladies haul our woes away
9.
THE PRIDE OF THE BORDER There’s a one I alone_has my heart in a spell And ohh if I could, I would court her so well Her name I won’t say but her face you may know well For they call her the Pride of the Border Oh the women of the south have a legend they say How the stars left the sky when she wandered away Til the tears of the men filled the towns of the bay Just to shine for the Pride of the Border So the length and the depth of my love I will test In the flame and the flood and the east and the west Let it soar like a stone coming only to rest In the heart of the Pride of the Border At the edge of the world, there is planted a tree And it’s fruit I will gather her banquet to be And I’ll carve out her name on the crest of the sea As a pledge to the Pride of the Border With a dragon I will dance on the cold ocean floor Make a candle of its breath and a bell from the roar Then its hide I will nail to the top of her door As a token to the Pride of the Border Then I’ll bring her a song I will sing to the skies Of the things that I see in her wild Scottish eyes And the love in my heart I’ll no longer disguise When I marry the Pride of the Border Yes I’ll bring her a song I will sing to the skies Of the things that I see in her wild Scottish eyes And the love in my heart I’ll no longer disguise When I marry the Pride of the Border
10.
THE QUEEN OF THIEVES At dawn my love went all alone to take the morning air And on her pony rode away with moonlight in her hair Oh how the spurs upon her heels did oh, such music play To shame the very nightengale and steal my heart away All through the desert of my dreams I wandered to the well And fought with many angels though from where I could not tell Who held me from their wisdom til the time I learned to pray And there I lay in slumber til she stole my heart away Oh had she been the Queen of Hearts, she might have let me be Or had she been a Pirate Queen had pied me off to sea But as she was the Queen of Thieves, she loved me where I lay The broke the lock on Heaven’s door to steal my heart away And so within the sweetest flame, the fire ever grows The heartstrings of the bramble tree were braided to the rose Til in the thicket of the leaves that tangle down the days I found a baby crying fit to steal my heart away And now I’m in a deeper love than the Piper for his tune, the drunkard for his whiskey jug, or the madman for the moon For all she was the Queen of Thieves and yet, the Queen of May For I gave it to her freely when she stole my heart away For all she was the Queen of Thieves and yet, the Queen of May For I gave it to her freely when she stole my heart away
11.
A SOLDIER AND HIS OWN TRUE LOVE Of a soldier I will tell and the maid he loved so well With a love so deep no human words can say Of the pleasures that they spoke and the token that they broke And a promise to each other as he marched upon his way Singin Darlin O, Susannah don’t you cry You’ll always have the better part of me Oh the good lord knows its true – my heart belongs to you Though the rest of me belongs to Bobby Lee Of that promise he would sing as he took that broken ring Through the heat of every battle and campaign For a melody can fade like an echo on parade Or the half-remembered whistle from a long forgotten train Oh my darlin O, Susannah don’t you cry You’ll always have the better part of me Oh the good lord knows its true – my heart belongs to you Though the rest of me belongs to Bobby Lee Still the absence took its toll in the dark night of her soul Like the caging of a small forsaken bird For the pillow where she slept was the prison where she wept Undelivered from his promise, wedded only to his words Oh my darlin O, Susannah don’t you cry You’ll always have the better part of me Oh the good lord knows its true – my heart belongs to you Though the rest of me belongs to Bobby Lee Ah she wakened with a start and a hollow aching heart To the sound of tapping on her window pane That so often was the breeze as it played among the trees And she hardly did believe it when she heard this soft refrain: Oh my darlin O, Susannah don’t you cry You’ll always have the better part of me Oh the good lord knows its true – my heart belongs to you Though the rest of me belongs to Bobby Lee Are you crazy are you dead, is a price upon your head Is duty or is love the greater sin? Have you come to claim your bride, will you go or will you bide? Will another band of soldiers come to take you back again? Singing, darlin O, Susannah don’t you cry You’ll always have the better part of me Oh the good lord knows its true – my heart belongs to you Though the rest of me belongs to Bobby Lee Still she rose and let him in and his bootheels made no din As he came across the room to where she lay And the token was restored, all her waiting to reward Though he rose and left her sleeping at the dawning of the day Singing, darlin O, Susannah don’t you cry You’ll always have the better part of me Oh the good lord knows its true – my heart belongs to you Though the rest of me belongs to Bobby Lee
12.
THE WIDOW’S LAMENT I spied a young woman along by the Keys And heard her lament as she scolded the breeze Abusing the ships there and cursing the seas For taking her true love away Oh he’s bound for an exile of shackles and sheep In a land the almighty designed in his sleep Where creatures abound that should only be found In bedlam or deep in the sea But I swear to this truth that I sealed with a tear Not even the bride of a wild buccaneer Or the high riding queen of the western frontier Ever had such a lover as he Like the wheel in the wind he was rougish and wild He was soft as the breath of an innocent child He was pure as the dove and the taste of his love Was sweet as the juice of a bee But they’ve taken my pirate, my king of the cowboys Leavin me courted by peasants and plowboys Each with a mind like a horse’s behind And the skin like the bark of a tree And they come for a mistress, a wife or a whore Or a fine easy mare who’s been ridden before But I’d have to be dead to be found in a bed With a lout like the best of em be So if even the finest should dance through my door With a neck like a bullock and balls like a boar Well he numbers his coin like the sands of the boin And he’ll not get a leg over me So the nuns of the Magadalene Laundry can perch Like the haggard old bats in the roof of the church Trading penance and soapsuds for honour and hope For they’ll never take either from me Then I’ll trade all the money I hold in my purse To see his tormentors live under a curse May the winds of their fortune blow all in reverse Though they live to a hundred and three And I pledge to the seabirds and all the good fish If the faeries will answer and honour my wish May the balls of his jailers be yours in a dish May their widows be lonely as me
13.
THE FLOWERS OF AUSCHWITZ Oh the snow was softly falling on a little Polish town And the winds of late December they were warning, The clouds were all the color of the finest wedding gown And it wasn't from the clouds that it was snowing .... And as we count the number of their names May we come to see their ashes as the flower in the flame.... May our knowledge be the measure of our darkest memories, May our mercy be the measure of our knowing. They have killed another prophet sang the skies to Bolivar Now the heart of every hero will be aching.... But the silence only deepened in the bones of his guitar With the sound of every finger they were breaking... And the song goes on forever if its true While tyrants rock like roses in the dark and bloody dew, Till our words become the anthem of a never ending love, And the music sets the measure of its making. I saw the queen of heaven through the doorway of a dream Down the streets of Sarajevoro she was sweeping With a flower for the children too terrified to scream And their mothers all to weary to be weeping... And if the hands of innocence at prayer Can rinse the smell of gunsmoke from the flowers in her hair May she lead us to the promise of a final pledge of peace, May our honor be the measure of its keeping. And if the hand of innocence at prayer Can rinse the smell of gunsmoke from the flowers in her hair May she lead us to the promise of a final pledge of peace, May our honor be the measure of its keeping.....
14.
'TIL THE CIRCLE IS COMPLETE Both the turning of the season and the ticking of the clock Say the planet's one year older – so are you. But I'll leave the speculation and the silly idle talk For another time and someone else to do. There'll be a celebration at the end of every street, When we claim our bread and roses, and the circle is complete. So if destiny should drag you down, or dress you up in style, May you never be too weary To walk another mile. And may you never cease your growing, And your learning as you grow; May the things that you discover Be the things you want to know May you gain in strength through sorrow, And may all your love be true; May you turn your hand to something That you really want to do. May your friends encounter fortune, And your comrades find release Though they see the hopes of others disappear May your parents die contented, and your children live in peace, Though the hands of desperation hold them near; Should the future find you lying with a lover by your side Or left alone with broken arms, and all your dreams denied May your footsteps ring like rifles through the darkness of defeat, May your spirit never falter, 'Til the circle is complete. And may you never cease your growing Your learning as you grow. May the things that you discover be the things you want to know. May you gain in strength through sorrow, And may all your love be true; May you turn your hand to something That you really want to do. May your life be like a love song in the act of every breath, Be a poem to the purpose that it serves; May you set your shoes to dancing in the hour of your death And meet it with the courage it deserves; May your shadow pass in pirouettes of such amazing grace That the tears of those who mourn you disappear without a trace. In the smoke that shapes their sorrow to the fading of your feats In a ring around the rainbow, Where the circle is complete. And may you never cease your growing, Your learning as you grow. May the things that you discover be the things you want to know. May you gain in strength through sorrow, And may all your love be true; May you turn your hand to something That you really want to do. May you turn your hand to something That you really want to do.

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SONGS OF LOVE, WAR, THEOLOGY, GOLF AND THE GREAT AMERICAN RAILROAD

All songs, words and music © and ℗ 1995 by Al Grierson, SOCAN, and A.G. Publishing, BMI except The Zephyr (Take It Slow) ©1994, Jack hardy Music, BMI

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released January 10, 1995

A special note of thanks to my family – Claudia, Kelly, Hannah and Aurelia for putting up with all this. Recorded and mixed at Sullivan Recording, Ashland, OR. Mastered at Acme Arts, Jacksonville, OR. Engineered, mixed and mastered by Mark Nelson – many thanks. Produced by Al Grierson. Cover photo by Helga Motley

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